Because of our move a whole 11 blocks south, I've been sorting and packing in the last 10 days or so.
I came upon my breast pump accessories, totally unexpected, and I lost it. I wept for over 30 minutes.
I wept for a life cut short.
I wept for a future denied.
I wept for the sweet boy I never got to see turn into a toddler let alone a teen.
Brennan Reed would have been 13 on March 22.
I wept for the suffering my innocent infant had to bear.
I wept, selfishly for me. For that family picture of all three boys in baseball uniforms lined up tallest to smallest. The picture that only existed in my mind.
I wept for the sadness I carry with me everywhere, even if it invisible to others.
I did not feel better or worse after I stopped crying. I just felt very much alone.
I miss him~always.